If you're considering organising a party (or even a surprise party) for someone who's reached their thirtieth birthday, here's a thought provoking article about reaching that magic age. Hope you enjoy it.
Searching for the Perfect Age by Jessica Rector
It is two days before my 31st birthday. When I was younger, I used to have these clear ideas of what my life would be like once I reached certain ages. I thought I would get the perfect job and fabulous career right out of college at age 21. I thought I would be married at 21, because when I was younger I thought that was sooo old. Even as I got in my late teens, I thought 26 was the perfect age and so much would go on at that age. After all, “Friends” seemed about that age, and life seemed so great for them. At 26, I knew I’d be a success and be making a six figure salary. I definitely knew I’d be married and maybe even have a child. I looked so forward to this age. When I turned 25, I felt old. I was now a quarter of a century, and that just seemed so ancient to me. Life would be all down hill from here.
Then my big 2-6 birthday arrived, and life was really going to be something. Life was going to change for me. Yes, on that day, I would feel different, new, better, like I had arrived. That morning my world crumbled. I was just the same as I was when I fell asleep the night before. Nothing had changed. I mean, it was the Millennium year; I was 26, and nothing had changed in my life! What was the world coming to?! I was still in school for my MBA, while waiting tables. I was 26! Why was I waiting tables? Not only was I NOT married, I wasn’t even dating anyone, nor had I been. My 26th birthday came and went like a harsh reality.
At that time in my life, I realized, “Okay, so maybe 26 is not the ‘perfect’ age. I think it is really 29.” Keep in mind, I’m not exactly sure what I thought would happen or change in my life for 29 to be the perfect age. With that in mind, what did I expect to happen in three years to now make 29 perfect? I just knew that 26 wasn’t it. I also knew the perfect age could not be beyond 29. Oh my, that would be the BIG 3-0! Never could an age higher than 29 be perfect, NEVER! You are just old at 30, and you can’t have the perfect age and be old.
So the next two years, came and went. Nothing very perfect happened in that time. I mean, I did go to Norway for six months on a MBA exchange student program. During that time, I traveled around Norway and went to Italy. Also, in those two years, I graduated with my MBA. Yet, life was really still the same. I was still waiting tables, although in a different city, had the same friends, doing the same things, and still not dating anyone.
Okay, now I was turning the perfect age. Life was going to happen for me. I traveled to Austria, Czech Republic, France, England, and Canada. Besides that trip, life was just like my previous years. This was supposed to be the perfect age. What the heck happened? So, 29 was not the perfect age. IT IS 33! After all, “Friends” seemed about that age now, and they had it all going for them. Once I am 33, I am also going to have everything going for me.
I had heard so many negative things about the big 3-0, like “It’s all downhill after 30,” “You’re really getting up there now,” or “You are just old.” My big 3-0 birthday came. I always had visions of what my 30th birthday would be like. I would have a bunch of friends around, and we would celebrate the whole night. I thought it would be a surprise party that my boyfriend had planned. I thought this was going to be the most special time of my life. Well my 30th birthday went nothing like that. I was in a city where I had very few friends. All of them were working on my birthday, and no boyfriend existed. I spent the day virtually by myself. My mom flew out with my uncle a couple days before my birthday. My 30th year actually started off soaring, alright. My mom and I went skydiving! Besides that, nothing this year has really changed, except I live in another city. I’m still waiting tables. Yes, with an MBA, go figure, and no one really understands why, except for me. I’m still not dating anyone (where do you even go to meet people, anyways?). So, nothing has changed, yet everything has changed... my perspective, my outlook, and my attitude!
There is no “perfect” age. I had this idealistic viewpoint of what life is like at a certain age. Then when I got to that age, I was disappointed, because it wasn’t like tv...what a revelation, I know! People know life is not like television shows, but yet, somehow and in some ways, we expect it to be. Would we really want our lives to be like tv shows, anyways? I know I don’t want the drama that is involved on tv shows. Sometimes we forget to really live life, because it’s not what we thought it would be at that specific moment. We get caught up in our frustration that life did not live up to some expectations and ideas we had when we were younger, and thank goodness it doesn‘t. Otherwise, I‘d be married to Paul Davies at 20 and never have known my friends, travels, education, experiences, or many things that make me who I am today. I would be stuck in a rut and wondering how to truly live life. When we allow this disappointment to consume us, we don’t remember that we are the ones affecting our lives and the only ones keeping us from living up to those expectations.
The big 30 is not what I had been told or expected it to be. It has changed my ideas, thoughts, and expectations about age. I thought I would feel old and nothing to which to look forward. Actually, 30 turned out to be the opposite, and the best thing that could have (and needed to) happen to me. I feel younger than I ever have. Age, after all, is only a number. I feel as though I can do anything, and I CAN! People say “50 is the new 40” or “40 is the new 30.” Well, 30 is still just that...30! It is all in your mind...your perspective...your attitude! When you change these things, your outlook on life will also change. You will realize there is no perfect age...only the best of yourself and how you choose to see yourself and your surroundings. LIFE is the perfect age!
Oh yes, and for my 31st birthday, I am throwing an all girls party…an all girls Strawberry Shortcake slumber party. Every invitation was addressed to the invitee in her previously chosen favorite Strawberry Shortcake character. The night will consist of things you would do when you were 8 years old. A party for getting back to your childhood...relaxing, having fun, and leaving all grown up stress at home. After all, age is only a number...and 31 is the new 8.
After earning a bachelor's degree and while earning a master's degree, both in marketing, Jessica Rector began to second guess herself and her career choice. Although she enjoyed this field, she felt her passion was elsewhere. She says, "Although I wasn't sure what it was, I felt there was something missing in the marketing field for me. So, I set out to find what what I really wanted to do. I needed to listen to what my heart and soul were saying to me." Through this journey, Ms. Rector traveled down paths that allowed her to take control over her life. She had her own television talk show in Los Angeles for two years. She currently spends her time empowering, edifying, and motivating others to live their life to the fullest.
